Noita

Noita…wow…what a game! I cannot stress enough how absolutely amazing this game is! I truly haven’t played something like it ever, I don’t think…it’s hard to even describe!

The best I can think to describe the game is dark souls, but 2D…with every single pixel physically simulated, with a complete magic building system, ALSO with a complete and insane alchemy system. It’s brutally hard. It’s unfair, unforgiving, and amazing. The emergent scenes that happen from the physics simulations are truly mind-blowing.

The other day I was playing a run, and on a platform above me there was an enemy jumping around. Up there was also a pit of toxic liquid…acid, I believe it was. The enemy unknowingly jumped into the pit of acid, which was already full to the brim. The dude literally displaced the acid to the point that it overflew it’s little pit that it was sitting in and spilled right on top of my head, burning me to a crisp with the little HP that I had left. BUT had I had a bottle of water, mud, or even blood I could’ve easily doused myself with it to water down the acid and bring the pain to a stop. Noita is truly crazy.

I found a random wand the other day that looked like it shot sawblades out. Cool!? Yes please. Upon using this wand, however, I quickly noticed that every second shot shoots a giant sawblade, and likes to ricochet around…before promptly reversing it’s direction and coming straight back twards you. I deftly avoided the first sawblade that did this - ohhhh but I knew where this was going. I started ripping enemies in half before me like some kinda crazed murderer. It was too fun! Only when I got overwhelmed by a couple of enemies at the same time did I miss a shot, and miscalculate how the sawblade would return. Check out the result:

I sawed myself in half

I’ve played Noita now for probably around 8 hours…I haven’t even discovered a small portion of the spells available in the game. The scope of things you can do in the game is overwhelming. I haven’t been this mystified by a video game in a lonnggggg time, honestly! The fact that the game can be purchased for only $20 is truly mind-boggling.

Even more mind-boggling is that fact that I’ve literally…LITERALLY not even scratched the surface on the total content of the game. I’ve not even came close to reaching the bottom of the world, killing the final boss, and “beating the tutorial” like the n00b that I am. Beyond that final boss you can do things like discover hidden knowledge, OP spells, even to go as far as becoming a GOD and choosing to level the world if I so choose - and that would be just fine, because then I could just break out of that world and enter one of the infinite parallel worlds that each Noita run contains! 🤯